Grief and love

Our society does not like sadness. When someone is sad, those around them want to do whatever they can to make them happy. Happiness is the goal. After all, it’s written into the Declaration of Independence, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” It is the goal of the American life.

Sometimes things happen that do not make us happy. These things can include the loss of a loved one, loss of a pet, loss of a job, divorce, and many other things that can cause grief. When someone is experiencing grief, the thought is they need to get past their grief as quickly as possible. Grief is treated almost like an illness like the flu – you get it, you feel bad for a while, you feel better, and then go on like nothing ever happened. However, that is not how grief works. After a loss, there is no getting over grief like nothing ever happened, and truly that is not what we want. We do not want to forget our loved ones and move on like they had never existed.

The best definition I have heard for grief is “Grief is love with no place to go.” Grief is the price we pay for love. The only way to avoid grief is never to love – anything. That is no way to live! The goal with grief is to learn to manage it and not let it overwhelm daily life. It fits into our lives, and we learn to work with it. That is what Restoring Hope Grief Support can help you accomplish. Sign up for a free 30-minute consultation to see if grief coaching is right for you.

Paul Fagala,

Certified Christian Grief Coach